How I (Try) to Keep a Cool Temper

Have you ever had an fellow co-worker who has been deliberately rude to you or a customer who has been totally irrational and demanding?  The first reaction from most people would be to blow your top and let them have it, which believe it or not is exactly how I used to be, but I have come to learn  that's not always the best route to take and in some cases, you might regret it in the long run.

Being able to bite my tongue, stay calm and collected in stressful situations is sometimes very difficult for me but experience has taught me that this is an invaluable asset for a good leader.  Here are some helpful tips that I have developed and implemented that help me in maintaining an even, calm temperament no matter what life throws at you:

Step Back: In some situations, the only way to see the situation clearly, is to step back and look at the situation as a third person.  Try and evaluate the entire problem from a logical point of view, not in an emotional, angry state of mind which usually never solves anything.  Losing your temper usually ends up with you feeling very embarrassed and realizing you owe someone an apology.  Worse case scenario will make the situation even worse than it was and can lead to other consequences.  You need to ask yourself if this is a situation that you will still  remain angry over a year from now.  If the answer is no, then let it go now.  There are many successful entrepreneurs that will say things that used to bother them don't even hit the radar anymore.

Be Reasonable: When someone becomes angry with you, just take deep breath and stay calm.  If you remain calm, the one who is shouting will quickly realize they are causing an unnecessary scene.  In turn, they will calm down and get a grip on their temper.  If you have said something or done something that was uncalled for, be ready to apologize.

Think Before You Speak: We've all been told by our parents or a friend that we should think before we speak because you cannot take something back one it passes over your lips.  If you don't think first, you can hurt someone's feelings and you can destroy your own professional reputation.  Your credibility could also fly out the window if you don't watch what you say.  If there is bad blood somewhere or just hard feelings, the best thing you can do is confront someone in private and talk it out.

Don't Have Thin Skin: Do not take everything so personally.  For example, as a business owner, I take great pride in my products and services and the overall success of my business.  I have worked long a hard to get my business to where it is today.  Sometimes we might receive negative feedback or revision requests from a client and will take it as a personal attack on ourselves.  We just can't do that!  In this instance we try to put ourselves in the client's shoes.  Possibly they are under a great deal of stress due to issues that have nothing to do with our business, and we also need to understand that they do not fully understand what we do or our processes.  If you find yourself in a similar situation, remain patient, show understanding and the same level of respect you want for yourself.

Walk Away From A Bad Situation: If a specific situation leads to to the breaking point, step away from the whole thing until you can approach it with a clear head.

If you are in a very heated argument, it's time to tell the other party you feel this conversation needs a little cooling off and should be addressed at another time when both of you are calmer.  Go for a walk or go workout at the gym if you have the time.  The idea is to get your level back to calm with clear thinking.  Stepping away from the office will help you relax so when you return you will have a new outlook that can help you solve the problem.

In all honesty I do still loose my temper. I am a genetic "Hot Head" and it takes a lot for me to keep my cool, but it is something that I am working on and am pleased to say that I am a lot better at controlling my anger to what I was a few years ago.

I hope you have found these tips helpful and if you have any of your own I would love to hear them. Leave me a comment below.

JD xx 

#actingpure #cooltemper #calm #positivity