Praise You: Increase Your Self Worth, Yourself!

We learn from a young age that praise from other people makes us feel good. We’re taught that it’s important to gain the approval of others — and in particular, of those who we perceive to be our superiors in one way or another.

External praise is important in developing a career; a professional reputation; in motivating you to keep going, to keep honing your craft; and it does give you a big confidence boost.

But if you find yourself searching for praise from other people to validate you — your personality and your general existence — then you’re likely to run into problems.

Seeking praise from others all the time can be a cause and an effect of insecurity. It’s not surprising that many of us feel our best when we feel the glow of someone else’s positive opinion of us, but if you need that in order to feel good, it can hurt. An increasingly connected social media culture only adds to the desire for external validation, as we have access to praise from others at all hours of the day if we want it. And it’s been shown that this connectivity can lead to depression and anxiety disorders.

But What Can You Do About It?

If you’re reading this and thinking Yes! That’s me! I need praise to feel good! — don’t worry. You can increase your sense of self worth yourself, slowly but surely, by learning to praise yourself.

Evidence shows that the practice of writing down our small successes each day releases dopamine and other mood-lifting chemicals in the brain. The effects are similar to those of receiving congratulations from a person you respect. So make a commitment now to look into yourself every single day for a little bit of praise, and you’ll find that your self esteem will be less easily shaken by other people.

It’s simple; it’s relatively easy; and it really does make a difference.

All you need to do is:

• Get yourself a notebook and pen.

• Spend five minutes each day scribbling down one or two good things you’ve done, or said, or thought.

• Give yourself permission to write positively about yourself. No negative self-talk needs to be written in this notebook.

Cultivate Healthy Detachment

At the same time, work on detaching yourself from what others think of you. Both negative and positive comments can have a big affect on how you feel. Instead of seeking the opinions of others, see if you can receive them without being moved by them.

Don’t apologise every time someone thinks negatively about you or something you’ve done. Acknowledge their opinion, respond in whatever way feels appropriate, but retain a sense of detachment. Their opinion does not change you.

Say to yourself:

I know who I am. I know what I’m capable of. Everyone’s opinion is subjective and personal, and no one’s opinion changes me.

When you cultivate this ability to be unflustered by the praise or criticism of others your self esteem will be more stable, and it will show in every area of your life. This is hard, and it won’t happen overnight. But keep working on it — it’ll be worth it.

If you have found this article helpful, please let me know by leaving a comment below and sharing with your friends via the social media buttons below. Have a great week and thank you so much for visiting Acting Pure xxx

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